Sorry for the couple of days with no posts.. It's pretty late but I wanted to get a quick update up before I try and get some sleep. I'm back at the hospital 24/7 because my little angel is back to nursing!! If you know me at all you know that I'm all about nursing... I absolutley loved nursing Benson and I was devastated that I was told I'd probably never nurse Bela. For Bela to be able to nurse has been one of our best acheivements in my opinion. It so rarely happens with these kids. So anyway, I got to start nursing again a few hours ago and she chugged like she never has before. She was starving from having no food for a few days and she was so ready to get back at it. I was so worried that she's come out of this surgery and for some reason not be able to nurse anymore. But that was not the case!
Anyway, miss Bela is back!! I got here today to see a wide eyed, squirmy Bela.. no more sedation! It was sooo wonderful to see her back! We sat together and talked for a long time and then she fell peacefully asleep in my arms for a couple hours. What a difference a day makes. Yesterday they were still a little worried about her, but she pulled through fighting like she always does. She got her breathing tube out late last night and since then has come off of all of her meds. She's just getting milk and a TPN drip. She still has some chest drainage so her chest tube is still in, but it should come out soon. She seems like a different baby today. She's so much more content and happy. Her infection was affecting her so much. She seems to be so much more comfortable now. I really believe she will be stronger now. Hopefully that was why she wasn't gaining too much weight and now she'll be able to pick up the pace a little and get back on track to where we need her to be for the next surgery. I'm amazed at how these tiny babies can be so strong. I told her all weekend long to keep fighting to get back in my arms, and she did.
So now we work towards getting back home. We have to make sure she's going to tolerate eating again and figure out the best combination of nursing and NG tube(nose tube) feeding to get her growing. I have to be trained on how to give her meds through her line for the next 6 weeks. Once we've got those two things down and Bela continues to be progressing, we're outta here! There was some talk about possibly this weekend, but around here you really have to try hard not to get your hopes up. We'll see...
I read Gracies blog tonight and it was very touching. We too have learned to make the most of each day, and never take advantage of one moment becuase life is so precious. I can't believe what a blessing Bela has been to us. With all her challenges have come great blessings. It is hard to watch her suffer, but I have to remind myself that this is all happening because of the incredible spirit my daughter has. She knew what she was doing when she chose this life, and she understood that it was necessary for whatever reason. We will come to understand those reasons as her life unfolds. Thank you for teaching your mommy sweet Bela..
I wanted to write a few words to those heart moms that i've been in contact with throughout all this with our little ones... We pray for you all and your babies night and day. We feel like we're going through this with you and we feel your pain through the rough times and cheer along with you through the good times. You are all inspiring us and teaching us as we go through this toghether. Thank you for your strength and faith. We hope and pray that we'll all soon be home with our healthy, thriving babies!!