Sunday, April 13, 2008

Today

I think we were spoiled to have gotten Bela home 3 weeks after she was born and to have had 2 wonderful weeks with her at home. She was doing so well and we were amazed but enjoying every minute of it. There was a piece of me that was wondering if it was all too good to be true and although I never liked to think it, I wondered how long it could last. We were prepared to spend the first few months in the hospital and go through many ups and downs, so I guess this is a little more like what we thought we'd be faced with. With all the challenges that her little body gives her, she's doing remarkably well. She's still doing much better than what was expected of her. It is frusterating that this is something on top of what she already has to go through, but sometimes things are out of our control. What is helping me get through this is that after she came out of surgery the surgeon came and talked to us and he said that he thinks Bela will come out of this stronger. He said that he thinks we'll notice a big change in her, she'll feel better, eat better, and grow better. That is what I will continue to hope and pray for.
She isn't doing as well as they'd hoped she'd be doing however. The procedure this morning took about 3 hours to get the PICC line in her. Her veins are so scarred from being poked so many times that the first vein they tried didn't work. They had to start over and finally got one in her leg. She's been through so much. Her blood pressures last night were dropping too low so they've upped the meds she was already getting and added more meds to help bring them up. She's back on just as many meds as she was after the last surgery. She's also having some irregular heart beats, so they're watching that very closley. She also hasn't been peeing very much so she's very puffy and swollen. they had to up those meds to to get her peeing more. They don't want to push her too quickly so they're going to take things very slow. She may not get off the breathing tube for another day or two. They havn't given her any food yet because she's not showing enough improvements and they don't want to over work her.
I hope that this is just her body trying to heal from the infection and recover from the surgery, and that she is just needing to do that very slowly, but that we will see improvements soon. the dr. has been in her a lot today and it always worries me. Its much better when you don't see too much of them because that means there's nothing to worry about.
I am reassured by the testimony that I have. I know that I have a loving Heavenly Father in charge of everything we go through. That will continue to get us through this. Thank you for your love and prayers. Hopefully I'll have some great news to post next time!
I also wanted to just note that i changed the setting to allow anyone to leave a comment that would like to, not just those that have a google ID. We love your comments, they let us know that people care and you'll never know how much that means to us during all this..

28 comments:

Colleen said...

Dear Avery and Benson, We're the Tanner's in Brazil. I just want you to know that my husband, Marsh, and I pray for you and your sweet family in every prayer we offer. I'm so sorry that Bela has had a difficult time these last few days. It is so hard to watch your little one struggle. I hope with all my heart that she comes through this latest surgery better and stronger. You are in our thoughts and prayers constantly.

Anonymous said...

YOUR FAMILY IS CONSTANTLY IN OUR THOUGHTS AND PRAYERS... BELA CAN AND WILL FIGHT THROUGH THIS!!! HANG IN THERE MOM & DAD. JULIE SIVLEY (WENDY'S COUSIN)

vixlove said...

Hi Milne family,
I am so sorry about this setback. It is amazing how when they are that small, things just change from hour to hour. I hope tomorrow brings a turn for the better and that you will be home with her before you know it. Avery, my heart broke when I read about your experience when they were trying to get her IV in:( You are doing such a great job of holding it all together. Sometimes what you have to do for her seems to go against every motherly instinct, doesn't it? I am praying that the ventilator comes out soon, and you will be nursing her and taking her home again. She is just beautiful!
Victoria McDaniel from OC

Anonymous said...

Hello Milne Family-
I don't know you but I am a personal friend of Rebecca Butcher, Annabelle's mom. I found your link from her page and have been keeping updated with sweet Bela the last few weeks. I have been lifting your sweet family to our Heavenly Father daily. What a comfort it is to know that Bela is being held in the arms of our Lord Jesus. I will continue to pray for her recovery,

In Christ-
Johanna Chapman
Columbia, SC

Simmons Family: said...

I'm so sorry to hear that Bela had to go through SO MANY POKES and another surgery. I absolutely hate when they have to try over and over again to get an IV and these poor babies are just exhausted from screaming... it breaks my heart. Bela has proven that she is a STRONG baby girl and will be off that ventilator and back home before you know it. Everyday is a challenge, but us heart mommies know the blessings that no others can. Hang in there :).

Andrea
Owen's Mommy

The Andersens said...

i can't believe what your little family has had to go through in such a short time. my heart breaks to think of how difficult it all must be for you. your family has been and will continue to be in our prayers. i'm so sorry for little Bela's setback. although our little Grace has not had as large of a setback, she has definitely had them. i've come to realize though that these little babies are strong. and maybe a couple extra weeks in the hospital is very much worth it if they don't have to go back. i pray that Bela will be stronger now and that she will recover quickly. i also pray that you and your husband will find the comfort i'm sure you need.
love the andersens

The Ridgway Family said...

I know that Bela will recover from this little infection and set-back. It will just take time. I know that when Eden got her infection, she took some steps back for a couple of days because the infection was so much for her little body. Know that Bela is so strong and will never cease to amaze you. We pray for you and think of you constantly.
Keisa

Meggan said...

Oh Ave, I'm sorry. What a downer to have to go back to the hospital and see sweet Bela back on all those tubes and stuff. That was good news from the doc, though, that this is making her stronger and more able to fight. I suppose that's like any trial...terrible while you're going through it, but in the end, worth it. I love that your testimony is so steady and strong. Hang in there!!!

S & K said...

Ave, I've been out of the loop for the last few days without internet, and my heart broke when I found out all of what you guys and especially little Bela have been through in the last bit. I hope that she recovers quickly and will be back and better and stronger than before. She is just such a trooper/fighter, I just love that! As always I think of you guys constantly as well as pray for you! You are such an amazing mother and have taught me so much---even before this experience, but you truly are handling all of this so beautifully and I am so proud of you and amazed by your strength, keep up the good work. And as always PLEASE PLEASE let me help in any way I feel so useless in this process!!!

Anonymous said...

We are thinking of you every day and hope you can feel our love from way up here. We are keeping Carol informed. (Her computer is down) Your family is amazing and we know that the Lord will sustain you.
Love the Yeates's

ashley said...

hey ave, have not been on the computer much latley and was so sorry to see the whirlwind of a week you guys have had.
my heart goes out to you, i wish i had something to say that could lighten the load. bela will be in my prayers- she can do it!

Christie said...

Ave, I am so sorry for all that you have been going through. Mom and Dad (Pam and Brent) have been keeping us updated and we finally got your blog address. You are truly doing amazing and Bella is being watched over by the Lord. I know it can't be easy but keep praying for strength and rely on the service of others whenever you can. It's amazing how little acts of service from others will lighten your load. I love you and wish I were there to help out. You and your family are in our prayers everyday. Love,
Christie

Bryant & Steph said...

We will keep you in our thoughts and prayers.

Krista said...

Oh, I think my heart just shattered reading all of your posts from the weekend. I just cannot imagine how you can tolerate how much this hurts your heart as you see her hurting. I can't believe this is her right now- from the peaceful sleeping girl I saw on Friday. Anyway, Bela is a fighter for sure. Hopefully the Dr is right and this will strengthen her as well as you while as see her ability to fight and persevere... she is astounding! You guys are always in our prayers and please know that we are here from anything you need. I wish I could giver you the biggest hug ever right now.

Ryan and Holly Gibb said...

Poor, little Bela. I don't like these setbacks that she has to go through. I hope today is a better day for her and your family. I think about you guys all of the time and you are in our prayers. I love your faith and positive outlook. Keep us posted on sweet Bela.

mandy said...

Your posts always amaze me at your strength and faith. Tanner's testimony yesterday was really special and powerful. Your family has made such an impact on so many people, including me, and I hope you know how truly incredible your family is.

Liz said...

Avery, We are sorry for your struggles. What a wonderful, strong mother you are. We love you and love your extended family. Please know that our family is praying for you. Love, Bart and Liz and Lindsey and Sammy and Brooks in Korea

Erin said...

Avery it was so good to see your family at church yesterday and feel of your amazing strength. You carry the spirit with you everywhere you go and have truly the touched the lives of so many people, especially me. Your family's testimonies are such an inspiration to those around you, I believe even to the doctors working with Bela. I know this bump in the road is not what you wanted right now, but I believe there is a purpose in all things. That purpose may not even be just for your family at this time but for those who are following your journey. Your little girl is still so close to Heavenly Father and I know He is walking every step of this with her. He will not leave her alone nor will He leave you alone. Please know our hearts go out to your family and we pray daily that Bela will recover quickly and be able to return home soon. Thank you for sharing such a special little girl with us and showing us what the true meaning of faith really is.

Jane Larsen said...

Hi Avery and family, This is jane larsen in boston waiting for katie to have her baby, 1 week over so far. I have been reading your blog and i have been so touched by all the words, pictures and comments. I knew you were in for a rough road from talking to your mom, but is sounds as though the Lord is really blessing you. Yes,it is all a great blessing the easy times and the hard times we learn so much more from the hard ones though. Our prayers our with you and your family and your little Bella. I am sure your mom is still there moms are such gifts. You have a very strong countinence you can hear it in your comments. The Lord loves you i know you will never doubt that. Hopefully tomorrow will be a brighter day. Just wanted you to know we love you all and pray for your little Bella, love jane

TC Jolley said...

Avery, I'm so sorry for the set back, I almost don't even know what to say. We love little Bela and we'll continue to pray for her and you guys. Please let me know if I can help with Benson. Thank you for you faith and testimony, you stregthen mine with your words. Good luck and hang in there baby Bela.

Anonymous said...

Dear Avery, I have been following your journey since Bela was born, thru your blog and from talking to your Mom and Beth. Though my heart aches for you and your husband and son, and of course, sweet little Bela, I can't help but be amazed at the strength and grace and faith we can all see in you. I have known you since you were born and have watched you become the wonderful wife and mother that you are today. Bela HAD to come to earth but she could not come to just ANY family. She came to the ONLY parents that would be able to support and care for her thru this painful struggle. Heavenly Father knew you could handle all the trials that will come her way. You will be strong and see her thru this. We all know it's true. The Millwards and Manleys have you in their thoughts and prayers always. I can not image the pain you and Tanner are going thru because I am not as strong as you are. Take care of yourself so you have the energy to go on. All my love...Anita Millward

AD said...

Dear Milnes,
You don't know me but I am a friend of your Grandma Nielsen, Aunt Beth and your mom. Beth told me about your blog, and I have been following it with absolute amazement at the strength, faith, and courage you have shown through these heart wrenching experiences. So many people you don't even know have your family in their daily prayers, and are keeping Bela on the temple prayer rolls. I know that Heavenly Father is aware of the countless petitions on your behalf, and I trust that He will continue to pour out His tender mercies upon you. I was so touched by the fact that your greatest desire has been for Bela to get stronger and gain weight, and this infection (as horrible as it has been) may be the way that your prayers are answered if it helps to strengthen her tiny body.
With love,
Adrianne Coleman, RSM ward

Marianne said...

I wish there was something I could do to help. Please let me bring a meal to your family or to Tanner and Benson or something. I know you guys are spending a lot of time at the hospital but if there is anything I can do let me know..Watch Benson? ANYTHING. This story is so eye opening you guys are doing such a good job of staying so strong. Let me know..480-707-1961

Marcus and Amy said...

Avery,
You probably don't remember me, I was in YW with you in the Santa Margarita ward, if you do then great! I found you on Nicole's blog, I have been following little Bela's story, I am so sorry you guys are back in the hospital. She is the most precious little thing ever! You have the most amazing strength I have ever seen! I really don't think I would ever be able to handle a situation like this, but your strength is amazing! Your are such an example to me! Your family and Bela are in our thoughts are prayers!
Amy
marcus-amy.blogspot.com

Brady Fletcher Garrick said...

We love you guys and are praying for you every day! We want nothing but the best for you and your sweet Bela. Thank you for keeping us all up to date on things.

Brady Garrick Family - Logan, UT

Laurel said...

Dave's mom here. Sally keeps me updated on Bela. I put her name in the temple today. You are in my thoughts and prayers. I'm so sorry for your setback, but I am amazed at your constant faith and courage.

Mike & Shelby said...

Avery and family,

My sister (amy) has told me about your sweet Bela. What a beautiful little girl you have. She looks so angelic. Your testimony and strength are touching beyond words. Our thoughts and prayers are with you daily.

Shelby
mike-shelby.blogspot.com

Michele said...

These babies are fighters!! Maybe our girls will have to get together someday! I pray that Bela will continue to get better. Good luck with everything.

Michele
(Gracie's mom)